Verse of the Week

2 Peter 3:18a "But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ."



Shaping Your Child’s Destiny

>> Friday, October 9, 2009

Larry Fowler


What do you want your sons and daughters to be when they grow up?
God’s answer: “I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleas­ing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship.” (Romans 12:1)
Early adolescence is the time when the drive for significance and acceptance by others begins kicking into high gear.
Think about what provides significance:
Destiny is a big deal. Many philosophers have posited that life’s most important question is, Why am I here? Christian parents have the responsibility to help young people see that the answer is found in fulfilling God’s purpose for their lives.

Here’s what a sense of God’s purpose for their lives will do:

-A sense of destiny gives direction in the major decisions of life. The young person who believes God is calling him or her to serve Him will consider that when deciding what college to attend, who to marry, and what to do for a career.
-A sense of destiny gives meaning to life’s opportunities. If I believe God might use me to influence children as an elementary school teacher, I’ll seek opportunities that contribute to that direction.
-A sense of destiny provides strength in hard times. If I understand that God may need to knock off some rough corners in order to best use me, difficult times can be understood and endured.
Being in the center of God’s plan for life

Your children must feel that they’re important to God, that He has a great plan for their lives, and that by submitting sacrificially to Him, their lives will please Him. Teach them that being a doctor or lawyer, or even president, is not the pinnacle of achievement, but rather to be right in the center of God’s plan for their lives.
When do we teach destiny? From the time children can under­stand it, of course. But preadolescence and early adolescence is the time to emphasize it. Middle-schoolers are just beginning to think about what they’ll do with their lives.
That was true for me. I was thirteen when a speaker at a summer camp challenged us to commit our lives to following God’s will. I can still feel the sense of peace, exhilaration, and significance that came over me when I told my counselor later that night that I felt God was calling me to serve Him with my whole life. Of course, I didn’t know then what this would mean, but that decision affected many future decisions—including staying out of a lot of sin—during my high-school years and beyond.

So what do we do?

1. Teach children they’re important to God. Help them be able to say:
My life is important because God made me just the way I am.
My life is important because God loves me enough to die for me.
My life is important because God has a purpose for me.

2. Teach them to desire God’s will.
Read to them, or have them read, missionary stories or biog­raphies of faithful Christians. Get videos about the lives of spiritual giants and watch them together as a family.
Provide as much exposure as you can to Christian workers, pastors, missionaries, and others. My daughter and son-in-law, Andrea and Ray, recently took their children (my grandkids) to a Christian concert and stayed afterward to talk to the musi­cians about their ministry. The kids were starstruck, talking for days afterward about it, and now they want to be Christian musicians. I know God will likely lead them differently in life, but that experience will make serving God with their lives more desirable to them.
Change your vocabulary. Don’t say, “What do you want to be?” and expect a vocational answer. Say, “What does God want you to be?”—and expect a ministry answer.

3. Give them service opportunities early. Many par­ents wait far too long to get children involved in serving God. Don’t wait until the midteen years and then send them on a mission trip where they paint fences and take clothing to the poor. When they’re ten or eleven, let them assist in spiritual responsibilities both at home and at church—leading worship, teaching, reading Scrip­ture, planning activities, and yes, mission trips.

© 2008 Cook Communications Ministries. Raising a Modern-Day Joseph by Larry Fowler.

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Fighting Fair

>> Thursday, October 8, 2009

by Matthew D. Turvey

Conflict. For some spouses, it's a way of life. For others, it's a word they refuse to entertain.
We all bring different perspectives and biases to how we react to marital conflict. There's not necessarily any one right way to handle and resolve conflict – but, be assured that there are some mindsets, behaviors and attitudes you should avoid in this area of your marriage.
In the following articles, we'll examine healthy attitudes toward conflict resolution and begin to recognize that, in the final analysis, loving your spouse is a very real way to express your love for God. How we love our spouse has direct correlation to how we relate to and love our Creator.
First, we'll look at the importance of fighting. Rather than avoiding conflict in marriage, we must embrace healthy conflict as a way to enjoy and love our spouse. Avoiding or denying the inevitable mix-ups of marriage only postpones having to really deal with them and grow through them.
Next, we'll see that resolving conflict is a balancing act. By purposefully holding back honest communication, the silent partner in marriage can stunt the growth of the relationship. The opposite characteristic – being the overly dominant spouse – also has its pitfalls. By finding appropriate balance between these extremes, we create a better marriage. More importantly, these characteristics often carry over into our relationship with God.
Finally, we'll examine the role of emotional and sexual intimacy in marriage. We honor God when we consistently resolve marital conflict without letting it build into resentment. Sexual intimacy, then, stems from emotional safety in marriage.
In the end, we can all do a bit better when it comes to resolving the conflict in our marriages. Hopefully it becomes clear that doing conflict a little bit better is a very real, very important way to honor God and express our love and devotion to Him. Let's not forget the eternal significance of our closest personal relationship – marriage.


Copyright © 2008, Matthew D. Turvey. All rights reserved. International copyright secured

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Surviving the Economic Storm

>> Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Ron Blue and Jeremy White

Plunging home values. Declining stock market. Vanishing credit. Fluctuating gas prices. Ongoing war against terrorism. Failing banks. Soaring food costs. Falling value of the dollar. Swelling budget deficits.
If you’re worried, you’re not alone. You’re not the only one feeling the uncertainty. Consumer confidence measurements have reached their lowest level in decades.
It’s easy enough to present our case that economic times are challenging. The daily headlines back us up on that. Our challenge is to prepare you so that you have less fear and more financial peace.
We want to help you develop a common sense financial strategy to weather the economic storms of today as well as those in the far-off financial future. In times of economic uncertainty, the strength of your strategy will determine whether you thrive or survive.
Let’s get started with a reminder of how you get ready for tough times: Prepare in advance.

Don’t let your dreams be washed away
The aerial photo is startling: An attractively designed yellow two-story home stands alone on highly sought-after real estate along the Texas Gulf Coast. Just a few days before, that house was part of a thriving community. Now, it is surrounded on every side by the wreckage of about 200 other homes and buildings. A private helicopter pilot, flying over the area after it had been slammed by Hurricane Ike in September 2008, took the photo.
Not long after the pilot posted the image on CNN’s iReport site, the buzz started. Viewers began debating whether the photo was a fake. After all, how could one home withstand 110 mph winds and a storm surge while every other building around it had been pulverized? The speculation ended when the sister of one of the home’s owners identified it and provided another photo of the house taken just a few months earlier.
Reporters quickly located the home’s owners, Warren and Pam Adams. Just three years before, the Adamses’ home had been destroyed by Hurricane Rita. Because they loved the beach, the couple wanted to rebuild rather than leave the coast. So they did—but with the knowledge that their new home might also be in the path of a hurricane someday.
The couple hired an engineering firm to oversee the contractor as their new residence was built. The builder put the house’s bottom floor on wooden columns that raised it above the surrounding houses. The foundation was made with reinforced concrete, and builders followed the latest hurricane building codes to the letter.
Despite its solid construction, the home did sustain some damage in Hurricane Ike. The first-floor garage and a wooden staircase on the home’s exterior were destroyed. The interior suffered water and mud damage, and furniture, appliances, and other possessions were ruined. Yet unlike their neighbors, who returned to their former home sites hoping to find a few personal belongings among the rubble, the Adamses can repair their home.
The precautions the couple took when rebuilding their home after Hurricane Rita may have seemed extreme to some. Yet their foresight appears brilliant now, after the town sustained a direct hit by Hurricane Ike.
In fact, the couple simply displayed common sense. They knew that their home had been destroyed once by a hurricane and that it could happen again. Of course, others along the Gulf Coast knew they faced that threat as well. The difference was in how they responded to that risk.
Like some Gulf Coast residents, many people today build their financial houses without much of a strategy. When you build something you want to keep, common sense dictates that you build it according to a plan and with materials that will last. This strategy works for all types of construction, from putting together a financial portfolio to building a house.
Warren and Pam Adams can’t prevent a hurricane from smashing into their home on the coastline. They can’t control which way the wind blows. They can, however, build their house to withstand the wind and water.

Mr. Blue goes to Washington
Palms sweating and heart racing, I (Ron) climbed the granite steps of the Capitol building to testify as an expert witness before a Senate subcommittee. I entered the chamber room where the hearings took place. I had often seen it on television. It was impressive yet intimidating. The senators were seated higher than the witness table and the visitors’ gallery.
I recognized many of the senators’ names on the plaques at their table and took a deep breath. I reminded myself that I wasn’t in trouble—even though the room had the feel of a courtroom. The Senate subcommittee was holding hearings on “Solutions for the New Era: Jobs and Families.” I was one of several “experts” from various economic and social fields. Other participants on the panel pressed for more social programs.
When my turn to speak came, I was hoping my voice wouldn’t crack. Could I live up to my introduction as a financial expert? Leaning in toward the microphone on the table, I began to answer a senator’s question about what the average American family should do in the current economy. I said I believed the American family could benefit from following a four-part financial plan:

1. Think long-term with goals and investing
2, Spend less than they earn
3. Maintain liquidity (or emergency savings)
4. Minimize the use of debt

The Senate chamber room fell silent for a moment. I was expecting laughter to reverberate among the marble columns and high ceiling at the simplicity of what I had said. The committee chairman, Christopher Dodd, looked down at his notes. He furrowed his brow and pursed his lips. He recited the points back to me. Instead of chuckling at me, he then said, “It seems like this plan is not just for the family. It seems it would work at any income level.”
“Yes,” I replied with some relief. Now I was the one doing a bit of chuckling as I added, “including the U.S. government.” We went on to have an engaging conversation about how the senators could exercise strong leadership through wise financial practices.
I had developed my four-part answer to the senator’s question over many years. In fact, I have heard that same question over and over. After a presentation to a large audience or in response to a call-in radio program, people often ask how to get out of a financial mess—or avoid one. Often the questioners hope that I’ll provide an instant solution for their financial difficulties. Though they may be disappointed to hear my common sense strategy, I know this time-tested, biblically supported answer works.
Let’s briefly expand our explanation of these principles here:

Think long term. The longer term your perspective, the better financial decisions you’ll make. Set goals in writing for the future. Invest for the long term and worry less about short-term ups and downs in your 401(k) or investment portfolio.

Spend less than you earn. To accomplish this, you need to know what you’re earning and what you’re spending. Make a spending plan (or, if we dare use that loathed term, a budget). Monitor how you’re doing. Develop the self-control to avoid overspending. If you consistently spend less that you earn over a long period of time, you will do well financially.

Maintain emergency savings. A reserve set aside will help you ride out the surprises life throws at you. You must spend less than you earn to build savings. Savings will then help you avoid debt. These principles work together.

Minimize the use of debt. Debt increases risk. It may allow you to do more or have more now, but debt will reduce your ability to have more in the future. I know of few cases of financial disaster occurring without debt. Financial problems are magnified with debt.

Some technical professionals, such as doctors and engineers, initially think these principles are too simplistic. They want to make succeeding financially as technically challenging and sophisticated as their fields. But you can’t go wrong if you follow these steps. What kind of financial trouble would you ever get in if you spent less than you earned, minimized debt, kept savings available, and thought about the long term?

When do I apply these principles?
The best time to apply these four steps is before the financial storms come. You may be thinking, Well, it’s too late for that. I’m in the midst of a financial crisis. The hurricane has already hit. Now what do I do? Here’s hope. You start with these four principles of financial success. If you haven’t done them before, then start now. You can’t lay a solid financial foundation without these four steps. They will lead you out of a crisis—and prevent many future ones.
Perhaps your financial crisis has already happened. You may have lost your job. You may be getting calls from creditors. Perhaps you fear a possible foreclosure. You’re picking up the pieces and trying to rebuild. What do you do?
Same answer. You start with these principles.
Perhaps you don’t currently face a financial crisis but are anxious because of all the economic bad news. The Adamses’ house is a great illustration that may motivate you to prepare for storms in advance. You can take great comfort in these transcendent principles that apply before, during, and after the crisis.
In fact, some positive results can come from our country’s current economic downturn. We’ve learned that a crisis can sharpen our focus. It helps us think more rationally. When gas prices rose significantly, consumers started moving from large sport-utility vehicles and oversized trucks to more fuel-efficient vehicles. This is rational. But even when gas was less expensive, was a Hummer ever a sensible purchase for an urban dweller?
People often ask us, “Now that _____ (you fill in the blank) is happening, what should I do?” We always give the same advice: Follow these four principles. If you set long-term goals and invest accordingly, if you spend less than your income, if you have available savings, and if you reduce debt, then you’ll be as prepared as possible.

Taken from Surviving Financial Meltdown by Ron Blue and Jeremy White. Copyright © 2009 by Ron Blue and Jeremy White.

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About Life Groups

L – Providing Loving acceptance of others
I – Increasing your personal maturity
F – Building close personal Friendships
E – Encouraging one another

Purpose: Life Groups are the place to connect and build relationships. They keep things real and on the level where we live. We believe that life happens every day and if we don’t weave God into that fabric, we miss what He really intended; to flourish and grow. At a meeting you may find good food, discussion about life topics, people being real with each other, and words of encouragement about how God is working.

Who Can Attend: Anyone who is willing to follow the Life Group purpose.

When and Where: Various times at various places. Some groups will meet on a weekly or monthly basis at different homes throughout the community.

Life Groups are a ministry of First Baptist Church of Wenatchee. For more information or to talk with some about Life Groups or any other ministry of FBCW, please call us at 509-663-7266; email us at info@fbcwenatchee.org or visit our website at http://www.fbcwenatchee.org/

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Life Group News

3-19-10 New! A new Community Group will be starting at Bill and Holli Brown's home (1640 Rainier St., Wenatchee) on Friday, April 16 from 7:00-8:30 PM. For more information call 667-7692 or the First Baptist Church of Wenatchee office.

12-8-09 The blog will be temporarily suspended due to site construction and church website updates. Please check back soon for updates.

10-7-09 The blog is up and running! First group meetings TBD. Check back soon for start dates.

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The Four Black Holes of Parenting

>> Tuesday, October 6, 2009

The Four Black Holes of Parenting

Barry St. Clair

Have you ever been paralyzed over the guilt of your shortcomings as a parent? I sure have. Sometimes we become afraid to move in any direction for fear that we will do something wrong, perhaps even make things worse.
If we view our imperfections without the light of God’s love, forgiveness, and grace, we can fall into emotional black holes that render us useless to anyone, especially our children! I’ve discovered that most parents tend to fall into one or more of four different black holes.

Black Hole #1: The “Done Its” Some parents feel they have tried everything to parent well, yet it hasn’t worked out for them … or their kids. Their precious little children have grown into angry, rebellious adults who bring more heartache than joy. Honestly, when we finish our primary parenting years, all parents question themselves. All of us ask the question, “Would I have done some things differently?” as we see what we think is the finished product.
With sadness I listened to a longtime friend talk about his son. In more than one of our conversations this dad has been on the verge of desperation. At other times he had resigned heartbreak written all over his face. During adolescence this son began to put up a wall between himself and his parents. At first he erected it toward spiritual matters, then later toward moral issues. The wall grew quietly, insidiously, and before long it seemed insurmountable. At one point his parents had to do an intervention, forcibly removing him from their home and taking him to a facility for wayward young men. This gut-wrenching experience left the father and mother feeling like a pair of deflated balloons, fizzling and falling motionless to the floor. After much prayer and counsel, they have learned to cope with their unmarried son, who broke up with his girlfriend after the birth of a baby. These parents have endured their pain and embraced the baby who came out of the unwed relationship. Underneath, however, heartbreak remains.
What should they have done differently? Having known this couple for years, the answer is ... nothing. Certainly they made mistakes, they have their flaws, they were not perfect parents. But they loved, nurtured, and provided well for their son. They made a physical, emotional, and spiritual investment in him that for most kids actually works. In truth, they did all they could.
Until recently it didn’t look like that investment was paying any dividends. But now, after years of patiently waiting while their son struggled, they have begun to see him come back to renew relationships—both with them as parents and with the Lord. The investment that they once questioned has begun to bear fruit again. What they saw in him as a teenager by no means will end up as the finished product!
Are you heading toward this same black hole of despair and resignation? Be aware, and be encouraged that “The Hound of Heaven” ever watches and woos your children back to Himself!

Black Hole #2: The “Haven’t Done Its” Parents often look back on their parenting experience and realize what they have not done. They wish they had done more. Living with that regret, they wonder if it is too late.
Because of the cultural lies that have been fed to this generation of parents, many of us get to a certain point in our parenting, glance back over our shoulders, and recognize that our children needed more of us. Due to dads who work too much, often boys haven’t had the fathers they need. With many working moms, other people have nurtured or not nurtured our children. Most of us wake up one day to the stark realization that the job we hold, the money we make, and the things we can buy simply do not measure up to the price we have paid in missing out on raising our children.
My friends Don and Cindi faced that dilemma and wisely decided to take a hard look at their parenting approach. Both worked for an airline company and lived with the long hours and the high stress of their jobs. After having children and realizing that they had fallen into the “Haven’t Done Its” black hole, they creatively figured out how to get out of it. Cindi quit her job. Then she used her abilities to begin an outsourcing business with stay-at-home moms—from her home. She finds clients who need a specific labor skill and then connects them to stay-at-home moms who have those skills. The clients pay highly skilled individuals at a lower-than-market rate, but the moms get to stay at home with their children and yet bring in income. And the kids receive nurturing attention from their moms every day. Everybody wins! And Don, the dad, has figured out how to use his flying privileges to take the entire family to places around the world where they could never go otherwise. Don and Cindi saw themselves in a black hole but refused to stay there.
Whether we have fallen in the “Haven’t Done Its” black hole only recently or long ago, we must understand that we can get out, and it’s never too late to get out.

Black Hole #3: The “Undone Its” These parents compare themselves to other parents and feel that they don’t measure up.
One mom I know sent her children to the same school that our children attended. She had sharp kids. They received good grades in school. They had musical talent. They excelled in athletics. Yet she always compared her kids to other children. It didn’t take long for her to start berating herself as a mom. “John just doesn’t grasp spiritual things like Austin. Andrea isn’t in the advanced class with Suzanne. Josh isn’t scoring as many points as Michael. We must be doing something wrong.” By comparing her kids in this way, she came up short in her view of her children, her husband, and herself.
Who suffered most? Everyone! Her low self-esteem that created these negative comparisons drove everyone up the wall.
These sorts of parents who feel like they don’t measure up look around at what other moms and dads have, what they do, and what they say, then look at themselves with condemnation and think, I fall woefully short of being a good parent. Actually most of us who fall in this hole (and most of us have fallen in this hole!) have done and are doing many great things for our kids. But we feel like the negatives outweigh the positives. This sometimes leaves us feeling like a piece of dirt.
Notice that I have used the word feel or feeling three times in the above paragraph. Often, due to low self-esteem, we don’t think consciously or act deliberately about the way we parent. Rather we respond emotionally, allowing our feelings to create our parenting reality. We see how our kids act and react in situations with other children. We observe that our children don’t always measure up to others. And then we react to that by reaching negative conclusions not only about our children but also about ourselves.
Comparing ourselves with others, negatively or positively, leads only to a dead end. On the other hand, realizing that God created each of our children uniquely—and that each has a God-given destiny—will absolutely change the way we parent. And that change will usually move our children to fulfill that destiny, not to mention beginning to pull us out of the “my kids and I don’t measure up” black hole.
If you find yourself in this black hole, don’t pin the burden of your self-esteem on your child’s shoulders. Instead face your insecurities and pursue your self-worth in Someone who can create real security.

Black Hole #4: The “Half-Done Its” Some parents function in the mode of single parent. Others operate with one parent pulling against the other, either in their personal relationship or in their parenting philosophy. These parents know that they do not and cannot operate at 100 percent capacity. Either 50 percent of the parenting team misses the action or 50 percent of the parenting team opposes what the other one wants. One produces a sense of inadequacy. The other creates high levels of tension.
Spiritual opposition between Mom and Dad can create the biggest mess of all. A tug-of-war, with one parent pulling for God and the other parent pulling against Him, definitely confuses kids. Yet if we find ourselves in this tension, we can be encouraged. Our children are not stupid. They see the light in the midst of the darkness. With childlike clarity and simplicity, they know right from wrong. Perceptively, they know what emotional and spiritual death looks like as opposed to life, and they will opt for life almost every time. However, you face the battle of living with spousal tension 24/7 and in the midst of that tension the challenge of finding the wisdom to live life God’s way in front of your family.
Even if you face such severe difficulties, you can dig out of this black hole over time with God’s help.
Beyond imperfections to purpose
If we find ourselves in one of these black holes, we need to admit that we feel defeated by our imperfections and guilt and ask God to lead us out. We need to remember the apostle Paul’s perspective on our past imperfections: “Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize” (Philippians 3:13-14).
Paul said that he had learned to do two things when the thoughts of his past started to immobilize him: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead. If an ex-murderer of Christians can get past guilt and go on, you can too. In fact, you owe it to your kids to do so, for two reasons: 1) They need a recovering, healthy parent who fully and joyfully shows up for them. 2) They need an example of how to handle life God’s way when they hit the wall of their own failures. God and His love for you prevail over your imperfections.

Taken from Parent Fuel by Barry St. Clair copyright © 2007. Used by permission of Crossway Books, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers, Wheaton, IL 60187, www.crossway.org.

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Core Groups


Do you know what your spiritual gift is? Do you know how you can use that gift to minister in the church? Every believer is an integral part of the body of Christ. Core Groups meet to help you find out which part of the body you are and how you can put your spiritual gift into practice. Through the encouragement and support of other people in the body of Christ, you will be challenged to minister in an effective way for God. Join a Core Group and see where you can serve God today.

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Help Groups


Are you struggling through life in one particular area? You've tried and tried but you just can't overcome it? All of us have struggles in our lives but there are some struggles that are harder to resolve than others. You are not alone. The people in Help Groups know what you are going through and are here to help. This is not a 12 step addiction recovery program. Rather, it's a group that meets together on a regular basis and uses God's Word to help them get through life's struggles. If you're at your breaking point and need a solid pillar to lean on, this is the place for you.

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Family Groups



Just as fire surges through a dry forest, the power of the Holy Spirit through His Word can surge through you. As you read and grow in God's Word, you will be challenged to live it. Even though your new relationship with Christ is exciting, it's hard to know what the next step is. Many times there are things in God's Word that are hard to understand. Just how can you take the Bible and live your life according to the things that are in it? That is where Family Groups can be a help and encouragement to you. Regular Bible study that is practical and relevant to your life is the main focus of Family Groups. You will learn and be supported in the spiritual things that will help you build a good foundation in your life as part of the family of God.

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Community Groups


Community Groups are a gathering of people who meet on a regular basis to seek out answers to their spiritual questions. Each meeting will be a review of specific questions that each group member shares. There is no pressure to have the "right" or "wrong" answer. It's a discovery process. Personal experience, group discussion, and the Bible are used as the group discovers answers to each spiritual question. Whether you choose to continue in the discovery process with your group or whether you choose to not return, is your choice. By attending a Community Group, it is our hope that you will develop a close bond with people throughout all walks of life and have an open and safe opportunity to have your spiritual questions answered.








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